Stop Being Everyone's Rock (Be Their Crystal Instead)

In meditation this week, I received a download I'd love to share with you. It came as a reflection on the familiar phrase, "You are my rock." What came to light was an insight about the difference between being someone's rock and being a crystal — and how you choose to hold your energy in all your relationships.

Here's what came through:

In times gone by, a few people have said to me, "We can be one another's rock." Yet, I knew that what they were really saying was, "I want you to be my rock to cling to."

In nature, rocks attract algae, lichen and moss—things that cling to the stone. They're surfaces for living things to attach to and, slowly over time, alter their appearance. People who may be insecure about themselves often seek out others who are like solid rocks to attach themselves to. I remember thinking to myself, I don't need you as my rock. I'm my own person.

If you're like a crystal, you remain clear, self-sufficient, smooth, and a source of energy rather than a surface for others' burdens. That's why people love to carry them around or wear them for energetic protection.

Be discerning when someone offers to be your rock; they may be looking to cling to someone like you.

This meditation revealed that "being a rock" often means becoming weighed down or altered by others who want to cling to you. By contrast, a crystal symbolises clarity, protection, radiance, and self-sufficiency; rather, it emanates its own energy. To live as a crystal is to remain strong without attracting attachments, to radiate outwards rather than absorb.

Discernment is needed because not all offers of support are always what they seem. When we allow others to cling to us rather than encouraging their independence, we serve neither ourselves nor them.

Next time someone calls you their rock, pause. Ask yourself: are you being leaned on, or are you shining through?

We cannot save people from themselves—only they can choose that path. But like a crystal, we can radiate light that helps them see their own way forward, empowering their journey rather than carrying them through it. We can love others deeply without becoming their saviour.

What this looks like practically:

  • Offering guidance and listening without taking on someone's problems as your own
  • Supporting others while maintaining your energetic boundaries
  • Radiating your authentic self rather than moulding yourself to meet others' needs
  • Being present without being porous

Wisdom Quotes

  • "The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer." — Psalm 18:2
  • "You are the light of the world... let your light shine before others." — Matthew 5:14-16
  • "True clinging (dvekut) belongs to God, not to another's strength." — Kabbalah teaching

Written and channelled by Lisa Precious